frustration

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fucking writing blank!
I have had one for to long! I can't control all the thoughts that spill and swirl in my head they just tumble and wrestle detroying everything they touch. Each thought smashing into another till they both break in two in an endless cycle of that which is driing me mad. I'm afraid I am running mad to often and will soon faint. It's strange because for a moment I thouht that I had beat my mind. But I cannot, somehow I was one of the ones whos mind is the enemy. How on earth to I beat my own enemy? I think I need to become friends with it. But anyone could hear the foul things it tells me then I don't think many would choose to be friends with it either. Maybe I am crazy. I know I am crazy. Bad fucking crazy. I don't think that it will ever go away, I think I have to constantly fight to pretend that I love that which I hate so much. I have never had a hard time loving anything or anyone. But I cannot love y mind, for it drives me to crazy. I just want it to stop. Please please stop.